I’m starting this with no idea what I want to say. I suppose I’ll start with the fact that I’m pretty sure I’m going to Japan this September for three months. I have no idea why but it seems just like the drastic measure in order at the moment. Although I love Seville, I need a break.
I have probably never been so up and down as I have since I moved here. The highs are high and the lows are not very nice at all. I suppose it’s better than a steady pace of boredom but I also suppose it’s not ideal. There are days when I love it all, the lifestyle, the language, the people, work, the weather and so on. Then there are days when it feels incredibly lonely and like I’ll never properly fit in at all. Friends are always changing, because it’s a bit like living in a holiday resort – nobody stays for very long, except me and a couple of other stragglers.
Part of me wants to stay and see it out until I’ve got a pretty good grasp of the language and comfortable as a teacher and with a solid group of friends. And part of me says fuck it. I’m a bit stagnant here, drinking too much, not speaking the language as well as I could and generally a bit broke and lazy and crap. That latter part was the one that made me apply to Japan, for a bit of a shake-up. Flights paid, job and apartment sorted, and a three-month contract. Enough to see if I like it and travel a bit, not too long if I don’t like it. I imagine the culture shock will be immense – going from lazy, siesta-filled, beer-drinking Spain to suit-wearing, punctuality obsessed Japan.
Meanwhile, I’m drinking too much, not speaking the language as well as I could and generally being broke and lazy and crap. Nah, actually, July has been my busiest month this year and was last year too, which conveniently coincides with it being hot as hell. Classes filled with kids whose mothers think they need the extra English during the summer. I was dreading it but it’s the adults who are more of a pain.
No romance to report, at least nothing worth writing home about. A revelation of love from a friend has been the height of drama so far this summer, and he’s buggered off home now so my life has been simplified somewhat. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing. The LOTC has gone into hibernation once again.
And so future plans: home to Ireland before Japan, leaving for Japan mid-September and return to Ireland just before Christmas, if I am not sacrificed as some sort of insanely tall white woman demon over there, and then in the New Year, who knows?